This rational house

In 2019, my fiancé and I purchased our first home together in one of the last stops of suburbia outside of Portland, Oregon. I remember being overwhelmed with joy and excitement at this milestone in our lives. Though, in the year we've lived here we've come to the understanding that buying our house was a dismantling of our dreams. By being rational about the constraints of my job, I had relinquished what we so greatly wished for.

When we started our search for a home, our dreams consisted of 5 acres of mostly wooded property near a small town. We wanted enough land for our shepherds to run and explore, and enough room to grow our flock with some privacy. I dreamed of having a workshop and studio where I would work surrounded by trees and nature. My fiancé dreamed that just near the forest edge she would tend to the gardens where we grew most of our food. We knew in our hearts the kind of life we wanted to live, and yet we came up so woefully short. Because it seemed like the reasonable thing to do at the time.

My world of possibilities changed suddenly when I went fully remote. Free from the burden of physical proximity to anything at all. I am now more comfortable and productive than I've been at any office I've ever worked in. I feel completely untethered, no longer obligated to participate in city life for wanting a career. I haven't struggled with work from home as others have. I found the boundaries of work and personal life quite natural and easily enforced.

Buying this house was once an achievement, and instead is now an object lesson in settling for what's rational. It stands a monument to compromise. A constant reminder that this very reasonable home is nothing more than a misadventure into a lifestyle we had hadn't wanted in the first place.


This rational house

Sometimes reasonable and rational decision making is what gets you exactly what you hoped to avoid

Render Machine

A quick overview of my rendering hardware and software setup & how it will evolve

Reductive Desktop

Reclaiming focus on my busy workstation is essential for getting things done and staying productive

Novia / Notes